Lately I have take some of the advice I have been given lately. I am letting K be mad and hurt. I can't really do anything about it, so I am letting it happen. It's breaking my heart and it's wearing her down. I don't like to see her this way. She is not the same person. She rarely smiles or laughs anymore and I really like to hear her laugh.
On another note, we are preparing for her parents to come visit from Thanksgiving. They are crazy. It's not just me that thinks so. K thinks so too. Their nuttiness makes our situation worse, since they are not really supportive of her. As her parent they should be sopping over with support, but since they suck, they are not. It's really to bad.
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For myself, I am doing well. I am plugging away at work and at home. There is freedom in the finality of being gay. I am gay and cannot change it no matter how much I want to. I cannot pretend I am straight even thought I know it will make it easier for everyone else. I have not come bursting out of my semi-closet, but I know I will never be able to go back in like I was. Taking that off the table is liberating, one less variable to think about.
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