I have that kind of love for T. No, nothing has changed about our situation. We are still "separated" and that probably will not change in the near term. (I am still hopeful in the long term.) We still communicate in one form or another every day. Texting many times a day. Calling a few times a week. Seeing each other in person, one every month or two. I would like it to be more, but we both have busy schedules.
We got together last night. I think this was the first time I saw him in more than 2 months. I might have been the longest stretch I have gone without seeing him since I met him just over seven years ago. We spent most of the evening together and I can tell you for sure, we still have the spark. There is still magic between us that I don't think can be duplicated with anyone else. All day at work I was so happy to be going to see him that I could not keep the smile off my face. Monday, I had ordered a gift to be delivered to him at work yesterday afternoon. I got word it was delivered just a few hours before I was to see him. It took him a short while, but he figured out the anonymous gift was from me. I am pretty sure he liked it.
When we got together, my heart was so happy. He looked just as amazing as ever. Despite his complaining that he had gained 5 pounds, he looked stunning to me.
I am not going to get into the details of out evening, but suffice it to say it was wonderful. We had wide ranging conversations and other activities that we both enjoyed. When it was over, I drove him home, had a nice kiss good night and I left with happiness I had not felt in a long time.
Here I am, the day after and I am still happy. There was a time when I would have become sad or disapointed, because after a nice evening, I was distracted by the dreams I had that may not come true. I do not have that today. Today I am basking in the love that I know we still share for each other, regardless of our other circumstances.
3 comments:
It sounds like you've at long last made peace with the restrictions a relationship with T entails.
Hearing a smile in your words is great to hear! I hope things continue to improve for you. Tis your turn to have some happy days!
Hi Biki,
Well, that's not exactly true. I have made peace with them in that we know the logistics of a relationship for use will be difficult to impossible, at least for the foreseeable future.
What I have also made peace with is, that T will always be my first love. He will always be in that special place in my heart where eternal love lives.
Yes I may find another boyfriend some day, but my love for T will still be there. Always. For today, that makes me happy.
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