I'm a gay man who married his best friend and started a family. Now I'm divorced and still trying to come to terms with who I am and what I want in life.
Wednesday night T and I had a date night. I picked him up at his office and then we went to dinner at an Italian restaurant.
As we walked in, I saw a tall, young and attractive black man behind the counter. The hostess handed him our menus and he led us to our table. I noticed the way his hips moved and thought he might be gay. As he sat us he spoke and listening to his voice confirmed my suspicion. I know that I may have been playing into a stereotype, but stereotypes don't come from no where, right?
We had our meal, which was just OK and then we went into the mall. I had ordered a new pair of glasses and they were ready for me to pick them up. As we headed there, we notices these 2 guys walking on the other side of the walk way, heading the other direction. T noticed them too because as they passed he looked at me and I knew what he was thinking. Gay.
After we got my glasses we walked out of the glasses store and we saw another 2 guys walking together. One was hugely muscular and wearing a string tank to show them off. The other was big, but fatter. They walked faster than us and caught up to us and then passed us. We could hear them talking. T looked at me again. I look at him. Gay.
Then we went into a big department store. T was looking for something for his mother. After wondering around there for a while, we headed out, passing through the mens department. I noticed yet another gay couple shopping together. This couple was older, like us, but they were clearly together.
We kept asking ourselves what was going on. I mean sometimes we see a gay couple when we are out. Not every time, but sometimes. And never this many in one night, in one place.
I guess since we don't go to the gay meeting, we didn't get the memo.
Yes, that was a bit unusual, seeing so many in the 'family.' There could be something else at play as well. I've become a lot more 'gay aware' since coming out and I scrutinize every man I see in public.
I was so clueless, even a few years ago, I would never have noticed any of those guys you mentioned as being gay.
I see gay men and gay couples everywhere, but then I assume they're gay even when they may not be. Honestly, I see very few obvious gay couples around here. I live in the Bible Belt, so being out is riskier. I wish it weren't so, and I think things are changing for the better, mostly.
I am gay man in his 40's who was married for 18 years to a straight woman, who is still my very best friend. We have 4 children together. She is now remarried and we still want to be supportive of each other and make a stable family for our kids.
Cast of Characters
Jim: That's me
K: The wonderful woman I married in 1993. We divorced in November 2011, and she is still my best friend.
T: My ex-boyfriend. We were together from 2008 to 2013. He is still an important person in my life.
AJ: K's new husband. They got married December 2011.
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4 comments:
But isn't it nice to see? :)
Yes, that was a bit unusual, seeing so many in the 'family.' There could be something else at play as well. I've become a lot more 'gay aware' since coming out and I scrutinize every man I see in public.
I was so clueless, even a few years ago, I would never have noticed any of those guys you mentioned as being gay.
I see gay men and gay couples everywhere, but then I assume they're gay even when they may not be. Honestly, I see very few obvious gay couples around here. I live in the Bible Belt, so being out is riskier. I wish it weren't so, and I think things are changing for the better, mostly.
Glad you had such an affirming night out.
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