I'm a gay man who married his best friend and started a family. Now I'm divorced and still trying to come to terms with who I am and what I want in life.
Peasant woman "Getting into trouble again aren't we Aladdin."
Aladdin: "Trouble, heh you're only in trouble when you get caught"
Palace Guard: "Gotcha"
Aladdin: "I'm in trouble" I was talking to a friend the other night about connections. He and his partner who have been together a relatively short time, are getting married soon. It is clear they are very much in love and they have an strong connection. I told him, what they have now was only going to get better. The connection a couple forges over time, that get stronger over time, is really something magic. Something beautiful. Something they cannot truly appreciate now. And the really cool thing is, it happens almost automatically, the more time they spend together. When K and I first moved in together, about 6 months before we for got married, we had no money. We rented a small one bedroom apartment. We had almost no furniture. We could not afford cable TV and because it was an downstairs apartment. What we has was a small TV, K used to have in her dorm, a VCR and a much of tapes. (My younger readers can click here if they are unsure what a "VCR" is.) One of the tapes we had, and watched a lot was Disney's "Aladdin" If you have seen the movie, you know the scene above is pretty funny. Between K and I, "I'm in trouble" said like the character in the movie is a thing between us, a connection point. And it has been for nearly 20 years. We have a thousand other connection points like this that have developed over the years. These connection points develop when two things are present. A lot of time past and a lot of time together. My K and AJ do not have a lot of these yet. My friend and his partner don't have as many as they will. T and I don't have as many as I want for use to have. K & AJ and my friend & his partner, have not been together long enough. T and I have, but we have not spent enough time together.
T and I have a plan to spend the weekend together next week. His office will be closed for Labor day. We will get together on Saturday when he is done with work and stay together until late on Monday afternoon. I know it's only 48 hours, but for us it's almost spending a lifetime together. I don't know what we will do, but I don't really care as long as we are together. He knows I have been frustrated with the amount of time I have been spending alone and I think this weekend will give us a chance to re-connect and discuss where we see our future going.
I am gay man in his 40's who was married for 18 years to a straight woman, who is still my very best friend. We have 4 children together. She is now remarried and we still want to be supportive of each other and make a stable family for our kids.
Cast of Characters
Jim: That's me
K: The wonderful woman I married in 1993. We divorced in November 2011, and she is still my best friend.
T: My ex-boyfriend. We were together from 2008 to 2013. He is still an important person in my life.
AJ: K's new husband. They got married December 2011.
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