Friday, March 23, 2012

Impressed By My Kids

On Tuesday we set the date of my dad's funeral.  I helped pick the date and if it was confirmed by the church, I was sure it would fit my schedule.

As I was driving back to North Carolina, Mom called and said the church confirmed our first choice date.  Perfect!

Then I got home.  I told the kids about the date and when we would fly back to my mother's house.  My youngest son, started to look upset.  He is 10 and of all the kids he was the one most emotionally effected by the news of my father's death.  I pulled him aside and asked him what the problem was.  

The funeral plans overlapped his school trip to the Outer Banks.  He and I were going to go on that trip together with his 4th grade class.  It was in my calendar, how the hell could I forgotten it.  SHIT!!

I told him I would try to work something out.  Maybe he would only have to miss part of the trip, or maybe we could catch a flight from there, instead of coming back to Charlotte.

UGH!!  What the hell was I going to do?  This trip was planned since September and we had paid a lot of money for it.  He was really looking forward to the time together.  I did not want to just tell him that he could not go.  I was afraid that in his 10 year old mind, he would blame his grandfather for making him miss the trip.  I did not want that memory to be attached to my dad's memory.  DAMN!!!

The next day I came to K's house after work.  My son came and sat down next to me on the couch.

"Dad, if we had to miss the beach trip to go the funeral, that would be OK."

"Really?  You don't want to go on the trip?"

"No, I do want to go, but this is more important.  I want to see Grandma too." he said.

I asked him about it again later in the evening to make sure he had not changed his mind.  He confirmed that he wanted to go to the funeral and be with the family.  

I was very proud of my son.  At 10 years old, I did not expect that level of maturity.  While he has always been mature for his age, I did not expect that from him.  My son really impressed me.

1 comment:

D. said...

Your last few entries have brought some tears to my eyes. Even though I don't know you, I am sending you warm hugs in this difficult time.

I just turned 23, but my Dad is turning 61 this year and in the last few years I've noticed some health changes (mainly because he had a heart attack). How do you learn to accept the fact that your parents won't be around forever? I'm terrified at the prospect.