Sunday, March 25, 2012

Outing Myself ... Again... and Again

I think this is the last time I will write about this, but I did out myself again in a very public way.

A couple of weeks ago I posted an essay about "The Straight Spouse" in response to a public conversation that the local NPR station was having about marriage equality.  Since I will be traveling on business for the actual event, I wrote an essay about my situation.  I posted the first draft of it here.  The radio station rejected the first submission because it was more than the requested limit of 500 words.  I cut it back to 499 and re-sent it.

I had not heard anything from them but when I checked their website, I saw they published it.

They also included my name.  My real and full name.  

This is not a problem for me and the only reason I am writing about it now is that K and AJ and I had a very funny conversations about it last night.

K works for a church the the rumors about her family situation are staggering.  For a while, the word was, she was cheating on me so I left her.  Then when she got re-married, the rumor was she was pregnant and it was a "shotgun wedding".  Now my dad's obituary indicates I have a partner with a male name and I have published my story on a major local radio station's website with my real name on it.

K was joking and complaining that now she is going to have to deal with that.  I told her it might help because it would turn the rumor mill toward me.  She still thinks they will blame her for "turning me gay".  AJ thinks it stupid to worry about it at all.  He thinks the more people I come out to the better.

Seriously, is there anyone left to tell?


Buddy Bear said...

Wow, when you come out, you don't fool around. Again, well done! I think AJ's view is very sensible. In any case, the deed is done and all you can do at this point is to feel free. That burden has been lifted off your shoulders.

Some (ill-informed) people will think K "turned you gay." That is a concern of my wife's also. You can't control the reactions of others and what they think, so she shouldn't worry about it.

The more knowledgeable and intelligent ones will know that it is impossible for a woman to turn a man gay.

T said...

Actually, Jim said I turned him gay. He had be bi-sexual for a number of years. Before that, he had been bi-curious forever...Just kidding... :)))

jim said...

You're not kidding. I was perfectly happy being bi-curious until you turned me gay.