It's funny that it was my wife, "K", who finally made me see it and accept it. Maybe she was channeling Dr. Phil, but she told me, "you have to own who you are." it's seems simple enough but it was very hard for me to do. I doubt this is news to any of the other guys who have lived a long time in the closet, but it was hard for me to come out to myself.
It was harder for me to come out to myself than it was to come out to my mother.