Tuesday, July 28, 2009

You are such a good husband

So far this has been a long week, but something happened that made me think.

K is the Youth Director at a Methodist church not far from our home. She has been working there just short of 6 months. This is the 3rd such job she has had in the past 7 years. K has a very strong faith,but she also strongly feels that God made gay people the way they are and we deserve to be loved just like straight people. But that is not my story for today.

The church is running Vacation Bible School this week for kids in the evening. My kids are there and I went too and offered to help. I have been designated the official photographer. About 35 kids are split up by age group and then participate in various activities. I have been running around taking pictures of everything I saw. Toward the end of the evening I was sitting with K and some of the church ladies when one of them commented, "What a good husband he is." Not knowing I am gay and that K and I already know we are not going to be married much longer.

"Yes, he is." K said looking at me a smiling. Remember we are still best friends who love each other. In fact, if it was not for the fact I "don't like girls" (her words) we would be married forever.

We talked about it after and she confirmed she thinks I'm a good husband. It made me happy and sad at the same time. I am happy she still feels I am good for the family but it reminded me that in a lot of ways I wish I was straight and could be happy living a straight life.

1 comment:

Tom said...

Wow, I am having a de-ja-vu moment. My wife and I were married almost 20 years, and while she chose to marry me knowing I had "feelings" for men, she was devistated when I decided to move out. We too were "bestest" friends. I truly hope you and K can remain that way.

I offer only one piece of advice: Don't leave K for another love. Leave to find your true self, explore being gay and what it is you really want for yourself first. Then take a step in the relationship direction. Just a thought coming from someone that's gone through something similar...