Early this morning K left fer her cruise. I wish I was going on a cruise, but, oh well. On the one hand I am happy for her. She has been working really hard and deserves the break. On another hand I am sad. It is yet another reminder that I can never go back my old life.
My Blogger friend Cameron (http://ifidotherightthing.blogspot.com) is having a hard time right now because he is realizing that his marriage may be beyond repair. Of course, I have know that about my own for a long time, but sometimes it's easy to forget. After all, while K and I no longer share a bed, we still live together. We do things with the kids as a family. We LIKE each other. So it is easy to sometimes pretend that that I still have a "normal" life.
Another thing is, K and I are sill near constant companions. Because we share the same house we are often here are the same time. We are not always together, she spends a lot of time in her room working on school work, but the fact that there is someone else in the house is comforting. Her leaving on the cruise without me means that I am alone in the house and I don't really like it.
One day the day will come when I will have to move out of the house, or she will. Either way, I will be home alone and I do not think I will like it much. I realize this is something I will have to eventually get used to, but not today.
1 comment:
Living alone would take a lot of getting used to. I don't think I'd like it either.
The way you and K have handled yourselves and your situation is an inspiration to me. Splitting up two lives that have been that intertwined for so many years is not easy. In fact, it's really hard. I can't think of a better way to handle the transition than what you and K have done. I hope when the time comes and you have your own place you'll feel as ready as you can be. Maybe this coming week will be a helpful step in that direction.
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