I don't usually get too upset over things. Usually. Today I am pissed and since I am in my house alone (with the kids sleeping upstairs) and have no one to vent to, you get it.
I have told you before the K works for a church. She is in charge of kids activities. As part of her job she takes the younger kids out of the regular service to another room and they have "kids church." Then in the evening she has night church stuff going on, so she has to be there too. On most days I go with her to church in the morning. The kids go and my youngest two are a handful for her to deal with while she is working. If I am there, I can help her with them and be an enforcer of the rules. I almost never go to the evening events and our kids stay with me.
Today was different. I went with her to church like usual, but this evening the event was a big summer picnic with one of those huge inflatable water slides and other water related activities for the kids. I went with her to that too. Since she has to run the event, and it looks good if her kids attend, I thought it would be best if I went too. Keeping in mind I am going for her and the kids. I have exactly ZERO interest in these church events.
In the end the kids had a good time. The the event - itself was fun, but the set up and tear down was not a lot of fun. And I did more than just watch my kids. I spent a lot of time in the hot sun directing the kids (some as young as on the water slide so no one got hurt.
When it was over and I helped her clean up (which took much longer than it should have). When it was all over, we were finally on our way home. K mentioned that she was going to take a shower and then leave for a sleepover at AJ's house.
REALLY?? Well, isn't that nice for you... It's a good thing I didn't want to be doing anything. So after spending all day working at HER JOB, she a was going to take off. I wondered if she would at least help me get the little kids to bed.
Look, this is not about her going to AJ's house. It is not about a sleepover, it's about me not sleeping well last night and then helping her with ALL of her stuff ALL day and then leaving me to deal with stuff here. It would have been nice if I could have gone to bed early and she could have taken care of the kids. Nope. No early bed time for me.
Am I being petty? I don't know. Maybe. I guess I will finish this blog, go to bed and dream about where I really want to be.
5 comments:
So where is AJ? Why isn't he helping his soon-to-be wife with her job at the church? It's not just about your kids! Her relationship with AJ, you would think, would cause him to offer her help with setup, etc.
There is more to a relationship than sex -- it is called "sharing"!
you definitely are not petty, you are just gay and after venting and whining all you needed was calling T for a goodnight wish.
You did a lot more than what's in dad's manual specially when you aren't interested in church events.
However your kids and other kids had a good time and when they grow up and think about this day, they'll remember a grumpy old man doing all the tough physical work and smile.
Things may change soon, however you can mention how you needed your beauty sleep to K later, she may understand.
ps: you are a great dad and that's the most important thing!
It's not about K or K's job it's about your kids. Think of it as having volunteered for field day at school. Not much different really. If you expected AJ to do this, then you would be abdicating your position as "Dad". To answer your question: "Yes, it would have been nice if K had helped put the kids to bed." But, remember, unfortunately, you will have to pull more weight. Like me, you were the one that "officially" caused all this despite the fact that you were born this way. We didn't choose to be gay/bi, but we did choose to ignore it, get married, have kids, and then change our minds. Life is a biach, but no whining. Go hug and kiss your kids, you'll feel better. Sorry if that's a bit blunt.
Did you get a good night's sleep last night? Do you feel better about it now?
Venting is good, especially if you vent like this and not at someone to whom you may later regret what you said. (Don't know if that sentence makes sense. I tried.)
I hope you feel more at peace now.
Deal with it dude. You just dodged a bullet. Just let her do what she wants for now.
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