Saturday, May 15, 2010

Happiness, This Exit >>>

K and I were in the van with all the kids.  They were all watching a movie and wearing headphones.  We were talking about how different things are now.  How much better.  Again she reminded me that if I had just listened to her int he beginning we would have been in this place a long time ago. 

On the one hand, much of the last 2 years was a waste of time, but on the other, there were a lot of things I needed to work out for myself.  Most of the really hard stuff is done.

There is some stuff left to do that will be stressful.

  1. We have to tell the kids we are splitting up.
  2. We (I) have to tell the kids I am gay.
  3. We have to tell the rest of our friends that we are splitting because I am gay
  4. I have to adjust to K  being with someone else and the loss of some of the closeness we now share.
  5. I have to build my relationship with T.  I don't expect this one to be stressful, in fact I expect it will be a lot of fun.  But it still has to be done.  I am in love with him and I really want to make this last a long time, hopefully forever.  But relationships like that need more than just a spark to keep going.

K and I had the weekend split up.  She was going out with AJ on Friday and I was to see T on Saturday.  We had a few unexpected kid related things pop up on Friday and her date got screwed up.  She was very disappointed and a little frustrated. 

I talked to T about changing our date night or, maybe he could come to my house while she was gone.  He is not comfortable coming to my house yet, so he suggested we cancel out date to let K go.  His idea was that since she is just getting her relationship going, it is more important she has her time with him when she can.

I thought that was nice.  So did K.

So now she is out, I am home with the kids and T is at his house, where his mother has put him to work in her garden.  

I will see him next week for sure.

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